Key Insights

• Spider Incident: Sydney Sweeney was bitten by a Huntsman spider while filming Anyone But You.
• Bathwater Soap: Sweeney’s bathwater was turned into luxury soap, sparking mixed reactions online.
• Immaculate Horror: She produced and starred in Immaculate, filmed in real catacombs.
• Jeans Controversy: A campaign for American Eagle led to debates over its slogan “Great Jeans, Great Genes.”

You’re about to enter a dimension, not only of sight and sound, but of celebrity… where spiders bite, soap sells out, and a pair of jeans nearly sparked the apocalypse. Welcome to the weird world of Sydney Sweeney. Of all the rising stars in Hollywood, in recent years, none has burned brighter than Sweeney, who became a breakout star in Euphoria (here’s all we know about Season 3), but recently has become a pretty big movie star too (well, except Madame Web). With an acclaimed turn in Christy (read our review) on the way, we thought it would be fun to look at oddball episodes from her career, which kinda illustrate how strange being a movie star in this modern, social media-obsessed world is. To note, this is just for fun – we have nothing against Sweeney at all, we just find it fascinating how obsessed people are with her. Some love to hate her, others just love her, but at the end of the day everyone’s talking about her, right?

THE FANGS OF FEAR

It begins on the set of Anyone But You — a rom-com where the chemistry is hot, the setting is sunny, and the spiders are very, very real. For one scene, Sydney was asked to handle a Huntsman spider. It’s not poisonous, they told her. Just enormous. And angry. And it is just a movie. The direction? Agitate it. Make it look scary. She did what she was told because that’s what actors do: they take direction. Unfortunately, the spider also took direction and bit her — sinking its fangs right into famous flesh. The scream you hear on camera? Not acting. That was pure, unfiltered terror. Hollywood wanted a meet-cute. Instead, Sydney got a creature feature. And I was planning to make a Spider-Woman joke here, but apparently I am not the only one. As with all of my hilarious jokes… Fallon did it first. Kinda.

BATHWATER BLUES

In one of the strangest celebrity merch stunts in recent memory, Sydney Sweeney’s bathwater was reportedly used in a line of luxury soaps. Fans laughed. Critics cringed. The internet, as always, lost its mind. Was it art? Was it exploitation? Or was it just a silly way to collaborate with Dr. Squatch? I believe it started out as a meme or just an internet joke, but this young actress apparently has a sense of humor, and legend has it… this whole thing was all her idea. The scent can be described as “refreshing notes of pine, Douglas fir, and earthy moss” — because of course it does. Either way, Sydney’s name was suddenly synonymous with soap, and bathing itself became a form of performance art. Like a strange celebrity-obsessed baptism. 5,000 bars were made, which immediately sold out. Now available on eBay for $215.

Sydney’s Bathwater Bliss offered the world watered-down pieces of her turned into commerce to cleanse us peasants. Freaky fans would lather themselves in her royal residue; her fancy famous filth. It was funny, it was strange, and it was controversial — cuz sexism or whatever. And somewhere out there, there is some freaky nerd scrubbing away the day’s dirt believing he somehow possesses poor Sydney inside a simple bar of soap. As if it were a strange and wet ritual worshipping at the shrine of Sweeney. Like something from a satanic horror movie and not a comical soap commercial. Speaking of satanic horror movies….!

BONES & BLOOD

Then came Immaculate. A film covered in Catholic imagery and bloody body horror. Sydney wasn’t just starring in it — she produced it. And this young filmmaker wanted authenticity. No comfortable green-screen studio for her; which meant taking the production deep into real catacombs. What are catacombs you ask? Basically, a burial tunnel… you know, a freaking underground cemetery. Yes, filming in a real location full of real fear surrounded by real death and haunted by real ghosts.

And yes, ghosts are very real by the way. Every time Sydney closed her eyes she felt them watching — an unwanted audience streaming her soul whose eyes rotted away centuries ago. Then came the strange voices which echoed through the tunnel-o-terror. Did it come from a crew member? Was it just the wind? No! It was the catacombs themselves; probably the bones whispering into her famous ear to “break a leg.” Cuz ghosts are very real! Not to mention the freezing stone walls breathing in the thick air contaminated with the dust of death and gallons upon gallons of cold sticky blood poured all over her body! Fake movie blood — but still! The glamour of Hollywood faded fast in this place; in this living nightmare.

Sydney described the experience as “terrifying”… which means of course the footage looks great reminding us all that Hollywood horror doesn’t always come from special effects; sometimes it’s built into the walls allowing us to feel it in our bones… or feel it in our blood… our DNA… our genes…. Speaking of genes….!

THE PANTS OF DOOM

Let us now look at Sydney’s campaign with American Eagle which leaned into a pun: “Great Jeans Great Genes.” The internet immediately debated whether it was cheeky cringey or downright problematic! Only in today’s political climate could denim spark a moral panic — and only in Sydney’s world could a pair of pants become tabloid fodder! American Eagle launched a campaign featuring the actress with the slogan “Sydney Sweeney Has Great Jeans.” Ya know because she is objectively considered attractive and not because she supports the dark history of eugenics! It began as a simple and cute pun — until it wasn’t! Within minutes social media users had declared it either racist or sexist or tone-deaf or some new word yet to be invented by the internet outrage machine! Sydney smiled through it because that’s what professionals do.

But yeah… somehow we managed to politicize pants! All because of words! Simple innocent words: “Great Jeans Great Genes.” But language has power and in the echo chamber of social media words and their meanings devour themselves! What was once clever becomes controversial! It was a mostly harmless scandal but a handful lashed out and even yelled at her on the streets! Some even went so far as to investigate her voting history to see which political party she supports — and let’s just say many were not too happy to discover that she may or may not align with their favored party! But this event does serve as a reminder to this young lotus (who just happens to be white) that even fabric can become fabrications and a slogan can rewrite your DNA.

So what do we make of all this? The spiders the soap the spirits and scandals? Maybe it’s proof that weirdness isn’t just a footnote in Hollywood — it’s the main event! It is the only sideshow left in our politically correct world of freaks! Sydney Sweeney is not simply another rising star; she’s a living parable about how fame today is stranger than ever — and I have a feeling that it’s only getting started! And maybe that’s the secret: in Hollywood it’s not the fame that defines you; it’s the weirdness you endure — and the nightmares you learn to turn into legend! Now excuse me I really need a bath.