Visiting the doctor’s office is not my favorite activity. Because of this, I may hesitate a bit. However, once I make the appointment, I know I need to be mentally prepared to advocate for myself. Learning how to advocate for yourself at the doctor is essential, especially when discussions focus on weight loss rather than your actual health concerns!

Unfortunately, visiting the doctor can elevate stress and anxiety levels. This is true not only for straight-sized individuals but also for plus-sized individuals. As a Black, plus-sized woman, I am acutely aware of how racial bias, weight discrimination, and fat phobia can affect my medical treatment. All of this adds fuel to the fire, increasing my anxiety significantly.

In fact, there is a term for the phenomenon of increased anxiety while at the doctor; it is called white coat syndrome/hypertension. According to Harvard Health Publishing, this name originates from the traditional white coats worn by doctors. Anticipating seeing the “white coat” or doctor leads to heightened anxiety and stress for patients. Consequently, blood pressure often spikes during visits.

As if white coat syndrome isn’t enough, living in a plus-sized body means I must advocate for myself firmly and strategically in the doctor’s office. I don’t want to leave without receiving proper care; knowing how to navigate fat phobia, gender discrimination, racial bias, and medical bias can help ensure you receive the treatment you deserve.

Let’s discuss how to advocate for yourself during doctor visits when they focus primarily on weight loss.

How to Advocate for Yourself at the Doctor When Weight Is the Focus

Skip The Scale

This may surprise you; however, I choose to decline being weighed at the beginning of my appointment. Patients have the right to informed consent and can refuse procedures that are not medically necessary, including weighing in certain situations.

An article from Within, a treatment facility, offers several ways to decline being weighed:

• Simply say “no” without explanation; they must honor your needs.
• “I don’t want to be weighed unless it’s medically necessary. Please explain why this is medically necessary so I can provide informed consent.”
• “I decline being weighed today.”
• “Being weighed makes me uncomfortable; therefore, I will decline.”
• “No thank you; I don’t want to be weighed today.”

With practice, advocating for yourself at the doctor’s office will become easier; uncomfortable moments like declining to be weighed will soon become effortless.

Have A List Ready

A study published in Science Direct indicates that a lack of preparation before appointments hinders communication with healthcare providers.

During a doctor’s visit, many things happen quickly. Having a list can help you advocate for yourself effectively when healthcare providers focus solely on calorie restriction and exercise. Here are some key points to remember:

• A list helps you stay organized: write down your symptoms and current medications.
• A list keeps you focused: jot down your questions for your doctor and how they relate to your current medical needs.
• Bring a list of tracked patterns and occurrences for data and proof.
• Write down the phrase: “What tests would you run if I were a smaller patient?”

Bring A Friend

Research published in BMC Geriatrics shows that companions during medical visits play crucial roles in advocating for patients by helping them understand treatment plans and coordinating follow-up care. The study found that only 15% of patients remember information incorrectly or not at all according to Select Dr., a medical blog.

Having a support person can help you remember important information during your visit and give you courage to ask essential questions. Bringing a loved one is always beneficial; it makes me feel safer knowing someone is in my corner. Remind your loved one to:

• Ask for documentation.
• Take notes.
• Ask questions.
• Be supportive.

Shop Around

Why continue with an unsatisfactory provider? Sometimes finding your community is the best option. At the first sign of fat phobia or dismissal of my concerns, I promptly discontinue services with that provider. I remind doctors that I am a paying customer and we are working together for my health’s best interest.

You can also seek Health at Every Size (HAES)-aligned providers or weight-neutral doctors who prioritize overall health rather than just weight.

I advocate for myself by highlighting discrimination and planning accordingly. Full transparency: finding a good medical team requires effort! However, you deserve it—read reviews, ask for referrals, and call around. You might be surprised to find a body-positive provider nearby.

Red Flags to Watch for at the Doctor

Not every uncomfortable moment at the doctor is harmless; sometimes what feels “off” truly is. When conversations overly focus on weight loss, it can lead to missed diagnoses and unnecessary frustration.

Here are some red flags to watch out for:

Your symptoms are dismissed without testing:
If you raise a concern and your provider immediately attributes it to your weight without ordering labs or further evaluation—that’s a red flag. You deserve thorough investigation rather than assumptions.

Weight loss is prescribed as the only solution:
While weight may be one aspect of overall health—it should not be the sole recommendation for every issue. If your provider defaults to “lose weight” without discussing other treatments or root causes—it may be time to seek more comprehensive care.

Your concerns are minimized or interrupted:
If you feel rushed or that your questions are brushed aside—that’s not quality care. You should feel heard and respected in decisions about your body.

There is resistance to running tests or exploring alternatives:
If you ask “What tests would you run if I were a smaller patient?” and receive hesitation—that’s significant information. Advocacy sometimes involves asking tough questions.

You leave feeling confused or unsupported:
Trust your gut; if you consistently leave appointments feeling worse than when you arrived—it may be time to consider a new provider who aligns with your needs and respects your experiences.

A Quick Reminder

Experiencing one of these issues doesn’t automatically mean your provider is “bad,” but patterns matter. You deserve care that is thorough and respectful—rooted in your actual health concerns rather than assumptions about your body.

Practice Makes Perfect

Ultimately advocating for yourself at the doctor’s office takes practice—a skill that improves with repetition. Learning how to advocate effectively is one of your most powerful tools in protecting your health and ensuring you receive deserved care. So hold your head high—remember that you are not alone—you’ve got this!

This is not medical advice; please consult a licensed healthcare professional for guidance specific to your health needs.